


Identity

by clockwork_spider



Category: Akatsuki no Yona | Yona of the Dawn
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Identity Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-13 12:31:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14748929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clockwork_spider/pseuds/clockwork_spider
Summary: This is a world where Soowon told Hak about Yuhon’s murder very early on, and Hak had to watch him interact with Il like nothing’s wrong.





	Identity

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Distribution of Misery](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9485489) by [Mooselk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mooselk/pseuds/Mooselk). 



> Please read Distribution of Misery linked there first. You want to be sad, don't you?

He held out his hand, and Soowon laughed as he took it.

“This must be what having a big brother feels like,” Soowon said, smile blinding.

Hak had never really felt Soowon was someone to be protected, not the same way Princess Yona was. They were the same age, and Soowon… always knew what he was doing. But that moment, with Soowon’s slightly smaller hand in his own, he wanted to keep his friend safe forever.

* * *

“How have you been, Soowon?” King Il asked as he approached, a gentle smile on his face.

Hak could still see it in his mind, Soowon, wild-eyed and shaking, clutching onto Hak like a lifeline. “It was  _him_. It was Uncle Il.  _He_  did it!”

‘Get away from him,’ Hak wanted to shout. He wanted to push the king away from his friend. He wanted to protect Soowon.

But he couldn’t. They couldn’t let Il find out. He stood, frozen as the man who murdered Soowon’s father placed a hand on Soowon’s shoulder.

But Soowon’s smiled sweetly, thanked the King for his concern and exchanged polite pleasantries.

Soowon made a light joke, they both chuckled softly.

Hak felt sick.

* * *

“Soowon… Are you…”  _Okay?_  He wanted to ask. But how could he be? How could he, with a gentle smile to his father’s murderer?

“Sometimes,” Soowon looked into the distance, with a high, nervous little laugh, “I get so absorbed playing the person I’m supposed to be, that I don’t really know what I am anymore.”

Hak didn’t know what to say, didn’t know what to answer. The vacant look in his friend’s eyes scares him. Soowon’s easygoing smile before the king scares him.

Soowon scared him.

“Nevermind.” Soowon smiled. It looked like the same gentle smile he gave King Il, and Hak could feel Soowon fading.

“Wait!” Hak grabbed a hold of Soowon’s hand, held onto it tightly the way they did at the festival.  _“This must be what having a big brother feels like.”_

“You’re right here!” He pulled Soowon closer to him, and wrapped him in a tight embrace, “the Soowon I know is right here!”

For a moment, Soowon was completely, frighteningly still, before he leaned his weight against Hak’s shoulder. There was a quiet, barely-whispered “Thank you.”

And even as Hak held on, as tightly as he could, he wondered if Soowon was slipping away.


End file.
